Much rambling (oh and Weigh In day...)

The last day of the year! This is the first time in several years that I feel some ‘peace’ going forward. It some respects, it’s been a tough year (ie. My bad car accident), but in many ways, it’s been the best year of personal growth I’ve had in a long time. Is it true when they say some times it takes a dramatic event to reset the balance in our lives? I feel like my accident , although the recovery was a bit rough on the brain there for awhile, was a smack in the head I needed! I’d prefer the accident did NOT happen of course, but, it is true that it was some sort of catalyst, or *jolt* to steer my life to a different, better path.

I have lots of rambling to do today….so thanks for bearing with me through all my chattiness! :-)
For my Wednesday weigh in, on this last day of 2008, I am proud to say I weigh a full 23 pounds less than I did on January 1st! I did not ‘resolve’ to lose weight this year…last year on New Year’s Eve I basically said ‘whatever’ – I’m not bothering with resolutions. My how things have changed!

Today I weighed in at 146, so I am ALSO happy that my holiday feeding frenzy netted just a one pound gain. *whew* I’ll tell you what though…on those days over the last few weeks where I ate, well, CRAP, I certainly FELT like crap too! Yes, I enjoyed some good holiday food and treats – but only mentally. Physically my body was saying ‘ewwww’. LOL – I am HAPPY to be back to Clean Eating!

Speaking of Clean Eating…I’d like to thank Shosh for turning me on to Clean Eating magazine. It is tough to find…you have to go to a Border’s or other major chain bookstore that has a large magazine collection. Or of course, check out the website, which is also great. This magazine is filled with healthy, wholesome recipes that the whole family can enjoy – complete with tips and tricks for cooking the ‘clean’ way. For example, using some mashed steamed cauliflower in mashed potatoes for a healthy boost. I am in the process of preparing my grocery list for the coming week and can’t wait to try a few new recipes. Anyway, thanks Shosh! I am hooked and can’t wait for the next issue which comes out in early February.

Also on the food front ~ this week I’ve been experimenting with my ‘balanced oxidizer’ food intake, according to Jillian’s suggestions….I should be eating a diet of 40% carbs, 30% protein and 30% fat and sticking to around 1400 calories. I was a little wary of this formula for a couple of reasons….first, 30% fat seems high to me, and 1400 calories seems low for me. I created a handy little food log (spreadsheet) which auto-calculates everything I eat. (I get my nutrition info from CalorieKing.com)

On Monday, I had a LOT of food, but still stayed within calorie range! The only ‘processed’ food I ate was Baked Lays, which I probably could have done without. I’m finding I’m a little heavy on the carbs, (ie 48% instead of 40) and I could use a tad more protein….this has been very enlightening for me! But, after two days, I’m NOT hungry and I feel very ‘balanced’. Since it has only been two days, I am looking forward to what my possible result will be by next weigh in. I need to work on getting the carb level down a bit. I’ll tell you what though, before doing this tracking, I know I was eating WAY more carbs then I am now, so that is very telling in itself.

On the workout front ~ (yes, there is more…..) Today I started my official Half Marathon training! I’m sure I shared my little ‘rookie’ plan a couple of weeks ago, but to give a little overview of how things are going to go over the next several weeks, here is the plan. I call it my little ‘rookie plan’ because, well, I’m still a rookie, and I’m slow, and I actually want to FINISH this race without killing my 41 year old self!

I used the ‘Smart Coach’ feature on RunnersWorld which calculated my training plan based on my 5K time, and how many miles per week I currently run (6-10), and how hard I want to train (moderate). Basically for the next 4 weeks, I will be doing ‘Easy Runs’ ranging from 2 miles to the long run of 5 miles in the 4th week. (I can’t WAIT to say I ran 5 miles!) My assigned pace for these runs is 14:38. YES that is S-L-O-W. But it’s doable for me, and I need to practice sustaining this steady pace because my 5 mile run in 4 weeks will be at 14:38 also, so while the 2 mile runs will be ‘easy’ at first, as I build to 5 miles, sustaining that pace and not slowing down will be a challenge. (And by the way I officially hate my Garmin which this morning had my pace jumping all over from 14:00 up to 24:00 – even though I was running steady the whole time - That thing is more trouble than it’s worth! So my ‘average pace’ was 16 something, even though MOST of the time I was almost exactly at 14:40, in between the erratic fluctuating of course.)

Ok, moving on…..The 2nd month of training adds in some Tempo Runs and Speed work. The first Tempo Run in week 5 is a 5 mile workout, 3 of which are run at 12:53. Yikes! It’s like a 5K! So again, this slow steady building the first month will HOPEFULLY prepare me for that.

The Speedwork that comes in week 6 is a little scary (for rookie me of course). Total distance, 5 miles which consists of 2x1600’s @ 12:10 and with 800 ‘jogs’ in between? Holy Cow…Translated that mean the workout goes like this:

1 mile warm up,
1 mile @ 12:10
½ mile jog
1 mile @ 12:10
½ mile jog
1 mile cool down

How fun will THAT be? ;-) Thankfully there are only three speed sessions in the 16 week plan, with the last session in week 14 running the miles at 11:55 (aw man….) so knowing I won’t have to do this every week is half the battle!

So I am looking forward to the training overall…it should be fun but challenging. I may be surprised and find my pace picking up more than planned, who knows….but I am not running this ½ marathon to be fast. There will be time for speed later. The same way I look back at my early weeks of C25K and smile over my struggle to run 10 minutes straight….I will some day look back at my measly 12:00 – 14:00 pace and smile again. I’ll be happy just to get to a 10 minute mile someday…but for now, I’m just happy to run period.

That is my rambling for today. I hope everyone has a wonderful New Year celebration! For me? A quiet night at home, a little bit of wine, crab legs and New Year’s Rockin Eve! Oh, and a promised round of High School Musical board game with my Grace. Alison will be babysitting and raking in some serious cash, Chris will go to bed at his usual 8:30. I will probably crash on the couch by 10PM (since I was up at 4:45 for a 5am run) and Mike will wake me up at 11:45 lol....

It just doesn’t get any better than this!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!

I am continually amazed at how each year seems to go by faster than the one before! My first and most important 'resolution' in the new year is to live in each moment fully. Sometimes it feels like I'm looking out the window and life is just whizzing by.

My first goal is to BE in every moment as completely as I can. Good and bad moments....I want to feel it and live it all.

I started running about 23 weeks ago. 23 weeks - that's all?! Running has been such a driving force in my life over the past 23 weeks. I can't imagine my life without it now. Yes, I am slow. Yes, I get a little impatient with myself...but holy cow! 23 weeks ago I could barely run 3 minutes without practically collapsing on the track. Thank the LORD for those strategically placed walking intervals in C25K...

My second goal is to keep running. Simply....keep running. I've come so far in the last 23 weeks, I can't even picture or plan where I'll be 23 weeks from now. Sure, I have a 1/2 marathon planned...I feel like I'm sort of flyin by the seat of my pants for THAT goal, but it sure will be fun trying! I am going to follow my training plan to the letter, and I am not going to get too hung up on pace and time. After all, new runners should take the whole first year building the base - so that includes me!

The other day I mentioned my vision of what I want to 'BE' at this time next year. Here is what I've come up with......


I want to be present and active in every moment in all facets of my life: parent, wife, employee, runner, friend

I want to be strong ~ This includes mentally, emotionally and physically. Strength of body and mind leads to the best life in all ways. I am sure of it.

I want to be happy.

I want to be proud.

I want to be grateful for all that I am blessed with in my life.

I want to be self-assured and confident, brave and determined.

I want to reach for things that may seem too high.

And celebrate when I succeed, yet forgive myself if I don't.


I have already made a good start to all of these *things*. I hope that a year from now I can look back at this list and feel good that I've accomplished what I set out to do!

Happy New Year to everyone ~ I am so happy to have *met* all of you and look forward to more fun and love in the coming year!

YOU in December 2009

I suspect most of us are probably putting the finishing touches on New Year's Resolutions. I know I am. I have said that I don't really 'do' resolutions. That is true. However, I read something the other day that really describes what I am trying to do with resolutions this year.

I have a vision of what I want to 'BE' by this time next year. I'm not talking I want to 'BE Skinny' or 'BE a size whatever'. But there IS a 'ME' I am hoping to discover more of over the next year. I've already begun to peel away some layers over the past few months, to find a 'me' that's been long buried or perhaps existed only in potential, who knows. It's been so exciting for me, and empowering. Empowering to the point that in terms of resolutions - I say, if there is something I want to DO, then DO.IT. Just DO IT. It can be that simple, can't it? Set the goal, make a plan, put forth my best effort - be accountable for my choices (eat the chocolate or don't eat it - my choice, my responsibility, I own the consequence).

When we really think about it - our best intentions and plans are derailed for one and only one reason...our SELVES. Perhaps we don't set realistic goals, perhaps we don't want it bad enough or the intended result is not 'valuable' enough to us. But I firmly believe now that if we want something badly enough, we can figure out how to get it - and just do it. There are some things in our lives that can't be controlled, this is true. But in the whole scheme of things, it is a very small percentage of life - most everything in our lives can be controlled by our own little selves, our choices, our actions, our hearts, our minds.

Making resolutions and taking action on them is all well and good - but what is the end result to be? It has to be more than 'I will lose 30 pounds this year'. So if you are successful with that weight loss, what will you BE after that? Besides skinny of course...

So I challenge all of you to describe yourself as you see you at this time next year. Mentally, emotionally, intellectually, physically - not so much what you will do to get there, but how do you picture yourself as a whole, one year from now?

I am working on my vision of Cyndi in 2009....I will tell you this, the 'me' I am today is not anything that I expected to see last year at this time!

I Am A One Hour Runner!

Yippee! My second goal has been met ~ I did a long run today of exactly one hour...Yep, 60 minutes! For me, that truly puts the LONG in LONG RUN! ;-)

I had planned to do an easy 30 minutes, but I just kept going. The first 20 minutes I did a few minutes of running and a 1 minute walk break, once I got to 20 minutes, I was starting to think about 'winding it down' for the last 10 minutes. But then I got to that 'sweet spot' (grin) and I just kept going. One more walk/water break at 45 minutes, and then I finished it up! Nice and slow - my heart rate was in a great place the whole hour, never exceeding 143. Easing in to the run slowly is what worked for me...I literally had about a 25 minute warm up ha ha. Now the distance I covered leaves a lot to be desired, lol. But it doesn't matter - today was about enduring for an hour...and I did!

This was an unexpected little happening today, and it was awesome!

Fitness Gifts

ON the running and fitness front....well, yesterday I finally got in a good 40 minute run! My last run was last Wednesday I think? I had to take a few 1 minute walk breaks every 5 minutes or so, which is probably the only reason why I made it through 40 minutes! I definitely have lost some of my 'fitness' over the last month, but it still felt good to run, and I'm feeling back in the game now. I don't think it will take long to get back to where I was.

All told, I think I missed a total of 4 runs since the holiday season began at Thansgiving. Which is one week and a day...it could have been much worse! I missed the mental aspect of regular running but physically, I think the lack of strength training has been the most apparent to me ....amazing how quickly we lose that muscle tone!

I have 'help' though! Ha ha...one of my favorite gifts, from Alison (my Tuesday night date for Biggest Loser every week!). This book is great...I've already read through most of it. Jillian's 30 day plan seems to be fairly 'do-able' - she promises that if you follow her plan to the letter, you will drop the last stubborn 10-20 pounds. The book is geared toward those folks (like me) who have 'stalled' weight loss and need to shake things up a bit. There is a quick base line fitness test to be sure that you are 'fit' enough to do this program (I am *whew*). There is also a test to take to figure out how you oxidize food - and then menu plans to support your individual oxidation type. As for me, I am a 'Balanced Oxidizer', which means my ideal food intake would be 40 % carbs, 30% protein and 30% fat. When I read over the menu/recipes for my type, I was happy to see that I am pretty much dead on with this balance, and only a few 'tweaks' will be required. The 30% fat was a surprise to me...I keep it lower than that on most days, and interestingly, on the weeks when I have more fat in my diet, I tend to lose better! The only other tweaks for me will be no alchohol for 30 days, and no packaged or processed foods...such as Baked Lays or granola bars etc. That should be no problem.

I am still not sure how I will approach the plan....She has workouts lined up pretty much every day, and unless I get up at 4am every day, I'm not sure that is feasible for me. So I may stretch this out over 60 days - basically doing the workouts 3 times a week, with my running, and using her menu ideas. The plan is really a final push to get those last pounds off, but it is not really geared for long term maintenance. (My calorie requirement for this plan is 1,400 per day)Although, I can see continuing the exercises or having them in a repetoire since of course I will be strength training at least twice a week as an ongoing thing. In the Amazon reviews, it seems the average woman lost 10-15 pounds in 30 days and definitely felt more strength and had more muscle definition. I think this would help jump start my running progress as I train for May, so it's worth a try right?

Another favorite gift from the husband is this book. I have not started it yet, but I can't wait! Written by Liz Robbins, it chronicles the stories of various people running the 2007 NY Marathon. Elite athletes and 'amateurs' - the stories that led them to that moment...it will be such a great read! Mike saw it written up in USA today and thought I should have it. I had never heard of this book ~ I can't wait to dig in!

Let's see, I also got some running gloves and headband for chilly weather running. And, I got a 'Griddler' which will be great for doing some indoor grilling this winter (healthy stuff!) and some Panini style healthy wraps! With a new gym membership and other misc. items - I think I am good to go!

I am working on some New Year's goals - which quite honestly, I really don't do resolutions each year. I've always found it 'pointless'. This year is different...I have all sorts of things on my 'to do' list for 2009. Much of it is fitness related of course, but achieving those goals helps me to get to some other things as well, so more on this as we approach the new year.....

I hope to sneak in another run today (it is 60 degrees today WOW), just a light run/walk again - but outside hopefully. I'm just working myself back in to a groove. I'm doing 'ok' on the scale I think...I have a bit of carb overload 'bloat' going as I am up and down between the same 2-3 pounds. Hopefully that will start to level off and I can get back to my 145 place I enjoyed ever so briefly right before the holiday, lol. The next few weeks will be all about inches for me though as I put myself through the Jillian torture!

Also, I am happy to report that I bought a pair of Size 8 dress jeans the other day! So I've dropped three sizes since starting this journey in July. I was a very tight 12, comfortable 14. Size 8 is a great place to be...so I wonder what will happen when I start to tone up more and whittle off some more inches? I'm so jazzed to get going! My father in law commented to me on Christmas Eve that I am HALF the size of me a year ago at this time. I was reminded then that I weighed somewhere around 170 at that time - WOW. I really did make some great progress this past year - most of it being in the second half of the year.

I can't wait to see what the new year brings!

Cheers~

Christmas Wrap Up

Merry Christmas! I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday. Ours was a perfect mix of chaos and calm, perfect gifts, over-indulgence (food, food, food ugh), family love and fun. We actually have one more family gathering this evening at Mike's sister's house. The 'Virginia Kolonicks' are in town today so we waited until today to do the cousin gift exchange and the grown up exchange.

In fact, the grown up exchange is a little different this year and I'm excited about it. Every Thanksgiving we all draw names, and of course that is who we buy for. The last year or two we've changed it up to do a game exchange, or a themed 'couple' basket. Running out of ideas, and not really needing another game sitting on the shelf collecting dust, Mike suggested a charity exchange this year. Each couple is putting the name of their favorite charity in a hat and whichever one gets picked, every couple will write a check for $25 to that charity, for a total of $175 donation. I'm looking forward to this, and I have to say...it's a real 'feel good' gift - as opposed to frantically searching around for that perfect 'unique' gift, or, buying exactly what someone 'needs' after talking to their spouse. ;-) This is a much more meaningful 'gift' , and I think it's a nice example for the kids as well.

The kids had a GREAT Christmas. I'll tell you what, no matter how old they get, there is nothing better than the looks on their faces when they come barreling down the stairs from our room on Christmas morning! We have a very firm tradition in our house for Christmas morning, and the kids stuck to it and climbed in bed with me when they woke up, while Mike went down to make sure 'Santa' truly came. He makes coffee, builds a fire, puts out snacks...then he starts the music. The Song of Christmas in our house....Joy to the World by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. As soon as the kids hear it they're off! Bounding down the steps to see 'The Spread' under the tree. Ahh...there's nothing better. It makes all the scrambling, early (4am) morning wrap sessions, cleaning, shopping etc. worth every moment!

Among the family favs this year of course is the rec center membership...we will be going next week to get our id's made. I am really excited about this....especially for Mike, who has been building up to this 'I need to do something about my weight' moment, and Alison, who will be starting softball training soon and has put on a few adolescent pounds over the last few weeks of inactivity. Grace is even chomping at the bit to run with me, and I am looking forward to the spring when I can get her out with me...she'll be 10 in May, so she should be able to do a mile or so right? She definitely has the energy for it, that's for sure! Alison is not so in to running, but she likes the eliptical machines. The 'teen' age group (13 and up) are allowed on the fitness floor at the rec betwen 3-5pm, AFTER they complete an orientation session. So I really hope that she finds something she loves to do...and doesn't just sit around in the game room/snack bar area with her friends! This is a crucial moment in time especially for my girls....I do not want them to go through the same weight struggles that I did....I want them to adopt fitness habits NOW...I can see my behavior starting to rub off on them in small ways and this is one of my resolutions for the New Year. Get my family active and fit! (In an oh -so -subtle-isn't- this -fun kind of way of course.)

I have some running and fitness related thoughts to write about too (something totally lacking here lately ha ha), so that will be in 'Part Two' of my bloggy catch up!

Happy Holidays!

Until next time....

I can't believe how quickly time is passing these days! This is how it usually is at this time of year though, and then January comes, and the next two months are endless.

So....cold enough for ya out there? DANG is it cold here in Cleveland. We're supposed to be hearty folk here in Northeast Ohio, but I don't know, the older I get, the harder it is to tolerate this sub zero wind chill nonsense. Relief is in site...I understand tomorrow I will need my umbrella and maybe a spring jacket lol...

With this crazy weather comes a 'bad day' for my Chris. I knew it was coming, I could see it in his face yesterday afternoon. This extreme weather is so hard on his brain! He doesn't even go OUT in it, and it affects him. It is the craziest thing. If there is anything to be 'glad' about though, I'm glad it is today that he is down and out, so he can enjoy his favorite holiday without being in zombie-land. For THAT I am thankful. Chris IS Christmas, and I want nothing more for him to be able to celebrate and enjoy it....

On the running front, not much to report I'm sorry to say! I only got in one run last week and I'm not sure why. Well, obvious reasons like there's just too much going on these days, school events last week, shopping, work etc. But I could have squeezed some early mornings in if I really tried. The fact is, I was tired and just could not get up at 5am to run...I did on Tuesday, but by Thursday, the week's activity had caught up to me and I couldn't do it. Part of me realizes deep down that this is a good time for a little 'break' - my soreness and somewhat 'hard' runs lately are the signs that my body needs to rest a bit, and I don't think one or maybe two weeks off is going to set me back too much. I'll do what I can this week, but I am doubtful I will score three runs. I'll be happy with two! December 29th though...look out, I'm back in the game full speed ahead!

Our family is getting a rec center membership for Christmas as a family gift...I am looking forward to becoming a gym person. It has been years! It will be nice to go somewhere else to run, besides in my basement. I am also looking forward to doing some eliptical and other cross training options. The flip side is....my fitness quest now becomes somewhat 'public'. People in my community go to the rec center...it's a very close, tight knit community. Everyone knows or recognizes everyone. So, I am going to be 'outted' in some respects! So the first week or so will be interesting for me, as part of my 'shy side' will be popping up for a visit.

I picked up a great Jeff Galloway book on Half Marathon training over the weekend while at the bookstore. I am very interested in the run/walk method he touts. So over the next week or so, I may be changing my training method for the 1/2 marathon, we will see....

On that note, I think it's safe to say I won't be blogging much, if any, over the next week. It's so funny how I feel so SAD when I say this! Six months ago I had no idea that I would be ending the year in 'this' place, healthier, happier, more fit and on my way to healthy, successful and permanent weight loss. I also had no idea that I would have 'met' such wonderful people through blogging, and the support and friendship you all give to me, and everyone, is really such an admirable and very cool thing. You are all Rock Stars in my book, and I look forward to getting to know all of you more, perhaps even meeting more of you in person, in '09! I look forward to sharing my first 1/2 marathon experience with everyone, and I look forward to sharing YOUR successes as well - because I know there will be many!

And so, I wish all of my Bloggy Peeps a wonderful season of celebrating with family and friends, no matter what you celebrate, and of course, a wonderful New Year filled with good health, love and friendship for you and your families!

Until next week....God Bless,

A Conversation Beyond Words

Whenever I take the bus to work, I usually sit with my head buried in a book and value the time as ‘mine’. The morning ride is typically quiet anyway, as most people are reading their papers and doing the same as I. Today, was different though. I had great company for at least half the ride, because I ran into an old friend.

I actually saw Terry yesterday on the bus, and I have seen him before at the last moment before he got off. Today however, I was able to stop and chat with him for a moment and re-introduce myself as ‘Mrs. Kolonick, Chris’ mom’, before going on to take my seat. When Terry’s face lit up with recognition, and the biggest smile I’ve ever seen, my heart was warmed. I told him Chris will be so happy that I saw him, and I would be sure to say hello for him.

I took my seat then, and I watched Terry holding his head to his hand in amazement that he saw me, and the excitement was just radiating from him. He turned around, smiled at me again, and then came back to join me in my seat. I was happy to have his company.

We had the most pleasant conversation. Terry works at a vocational training center, and rides the bus every day. He works from 8am – 2pm. His job is sorting things in to bins, and his hands get cut and scraped a bit. Terry has cerebral palsy and his hands are ‘tight’, especially his left, so it’s challenging work for him, but he likes it very much. Terry would much rather be working at a job than being in school! In January he starts a new job washing windows, and he is happy about the change.

Terry is excited for Christmas, and he is hoping he gets the Playstation 3. I told him secretly that Chris is getting a PS3, and that made Terry so happy. Terry loves to play video games, and sometimes stays up too late playing. Today in fact, Terry was very tired because he stayed up until 11:00 last night playing games.

Terry is doing great health-wise, because he has not had any seizures in a very long time. I shared with him that Chris has bad days once in awhile, but overall he is doing great. Terry was very pleased to hear that. Terry is living with his grandma, who takes good care of him.

Terry gets to take breaks at work and he loves to play basketball in the gym. I told him that is good exercise, and he should keep that up. He agreed. I shared some pictures of Chris on my cell phone and Terry’s eyes just lit up with joy. He said Chris is getting big! Terry has a new earring in his left ear, and he now has a beard and mustache. I told him Chris will not believe the mustache! Then Terry took my cell phone and punched in his phone number for me, and I promised him that we would call and set up a day for him to come and visit Chris. Terry was so overcome with excitement. It was very touching. Terry then signalled his stop, and we said goodbye with promises to see each other again soon.

My heart was warmed at seeing Terry. Terry is 22 years old, and left school a year ago to start his job. For the two years that he and Chris were in school together, they were great friends. They have a lot in common, and we had Terry to our house one afternoon and it was just such a treat for Mike & I to watch the two of them together. On Terry’s last day of school, there was a going away party for him, and the next day, Chris had one seizure after another and had to miss school. I knew immediately that Chris was overcome with sadness that his friend was ‘gone’, and that strong emotional surge in his brain is what caused his seizures that day.

The most compelling aspect of my conversation with Terry this morning though?

Terry did not say one word. Not one.

Just like Chris. Not one word. People around me on the bus could not help but listen and stare – I could feel it….but Terry had so much to say. And I heard him loud and clear.

If there is one great lesson that I have learned from my own son, sometimes it’s best to listen with your heart, not your ears – when we listen with our heart, we can hear, and feel, so much more.

Weigh In Wednesday

First...I realized I wrote my 100th post three posts ago! :-) Woot!

Second....when speaking of the Biggest Loser last night, I meant VICKI, not 'Tina'. (Ha ha...there WAS no Tina). Alison got a kick out of my 'loserness' when I told her my little mistake. In any case, I am VERY happy that Michelle took the big prize because she was the only one who really transformed herself completely...inside and out. She is fabulous!

Third, turns out the concert last night was middle school/high school - NOT the cute little 4th graders, lol. See what I'm saying? My brain is in overload, and apparently I have more simplifying to do!

And finally, I have a positive weigh in report today, at long last! It appears that I have finally dropped two more pounds, weighing in at 145 this morning. 17 pounds down, yay! This is actually quite a surprise to me....where did this come from? Last week was 'eat more move less' in my journal haha. How did THIS happen? I must have shocked my metabolism with the increase in calories. Go figure...will we ever figure out the magic formula for weight loss?

I have discovered tea! I have never been a tea drinker. In fact, just a month ago I was crackin' on my boss about her 'non-fat chai latte' addiction. GROSS I said. I would have some once in awhile, like when I was sick with a cold, but in general, NOT a tea drinker. So, over Thanksgiving, after dinner every evening, everyone would start making themselves a cup of chai tea and then proceed to sit around the table swooning over it, cradling their cups and saying things like 'oo, this is soooo good, mmmm....'. They all looked so peaceful and relaxed and calm and I thought, well DANG, give me some of that 'ooo this is so good' ! ;-) I had my first cup of chai tea with french vanilla in it, and I was hooked! I have all kinds of teas in my cabinet - Mike drinks it a lot in the winter, so I've been sampling fruity teas, spicey teas, vanilla teas...over the weekend, I probably had 5 cups in one day! It keeps me warm, because my husband keeps the thermostat on 66 and I am freezing half the time. Tea has a calming effect...I feel like I've discovered another 'magic pill' - just like running!

Anyway...after two weeks of tea drinking, I wonder how THAT figures in to my two pound weight loss? Hmmmm....

It's all about the luv...SELF love that is!

I feel so ‘far away’ from Blogland these days! I am so far behind on blog reading and have no idea what’s up with anyone ~ I’m having withdrawal!

I am having a MUCH better week. First, yesterday was ‘Comp Day’ at work. December 15th is the day every year that we get our letters stating our new annual salary for next year, and a second letter with our annual bonus, based on recently completed performance reviews. Suffice it to say, I was very well-rewarded for my hard work this year! (Like 3x’s more than expected!) Rewarded enough so that St. Joe’s for Alison is a bit more ‘do-able’…and that itself makes all the frustrations of the past year worth it! I even shared with Alison last night that this is a perfect example of how hard work and commitment is rewarded. We take the teaching moments when we can, ha ha!

I did a 30 minute easy run this morning and made a big effort to keep it EASY. Heart rate under 140 and basically running at a snail’s pace. But it felt good, I could tell I was not working too hard, which I think is my main issue right now - I have slowly slipped into ‘over-doing’ my runs lately. All three runs this week, and next, will be ‘easy’ slow runs, and hopefully I will be re-charged and ready to start my official training on the 29th!

I have two Christmas concerts this week, lots of shopping left to do, and then of course the wrapping. I cheated this year and bought 10 dozen Christmas cookies from a friend at work – his wife bakes, and they are GOOD COOKIES. I will not have time to bake this year, except for a few favorites for the kids, so I feel no guilt whatsoever basically paying someone else to bake for me! ;-) It’s all about the love, right?….SELF LOVE is happenin’ here ~ anything I can do to make things easier on myself to get through the next 2.5 weeks, I’m going to do it!

I will run, but run easily, I will provide home-baked cookies to my family, but I will not have to shop, mix, mess and clean up to do it! I am putting strength training on hold until after the holiday….other than doing a couple plank holds, and some push ups…keeping it SIMPLE, because it’s all about the love!

I’m kinda likin’ this self-love stuff….

Tonight – a little choir concert (4th graders – too cute!) and THEN, Biggest Loser finale! This is the BEST part of the season…seeing the shocking transformations. You can’t help but to be inspired, and I really have no idea who is going to win this thing, but I hope it’s not TINA! She does not deserve it, and she will be gaining all of her weight back, I’d put money on that!

Cheers all~

Houston....We Have A *problem*....

All is quiet in the house now on a Sunday evening after a weekend of coming and going, shopping, a birthday party, sleepovers for the girls....cleaning, laundry etc. *whew* I am a tired mama tonight! And I need a good vent, so here it goes....(deep breath...)

I had a 36 minute run yesterday, and something is 'amiss'. My knees are achey today, my hips are sore, my legs feel 'twingey'. I only got in two runs this week - THAT is a problem. And I am sore today from yesterday's run...THAT is a problem. Yesterday's run was also a 'garbage in garbage out' kind of run...thanks to my very poor eating the last week. THIS is a BIG problem.

So let's break this down....why am I suddenly sore from running? First answer is...I need better shoes . Second answer could be that I am slackin' on the stretchin'....this is easy to do, since a 36 minute run becomes 46 minutes with walking before and after, then stretching before and after...well, let's just say it's getting harder and harder to squeeze out an hour or more start to finish for my runs. I do stretch, but apparently not well enough....

Also, I have a consistently sore spot on my right leg...it's not the calf muscle itself, but it's at the very top very edge of the calf, on the outside of my leg. My nurse friend tells me it's my 'gastrocnemius muscle'. Hmmm..my research tells me (ha ha) that this is a common sports injury in the 'middle aged athlete' (cough cough), caused by impact such as doing lunges, or playing tennis. Well, I do have some lunges in my total body workout, which I haven't done in awhile, but I think I can trace this back to then. It doesn't bother me while I run, it starts a few hours after I run. It's not pain, it's just something I'm aware of when I bend my knee a certain way, [but it's not my knee, it's on the side of my leg]. It feels like I got bruised there or something. It goes away after a day or two of rest. Maybe new shoes will help with that too.

That's the physical stuff...now the mental stuff. I'm mad at myself for letting stress get the better of me last week. I ate poorly - not necessarily pigged out, but I was so busy and had no time to plan and it just wasn't happening for me last week. My work is crazy right now because my boss is on a medical leave, which was unexpected - and of course this is the WORST time of the year to be doing the job of three people. (Bad enough I do two jobs on a regular basis...) So I had some anger going on last week, on top of my angst over the calendar, the holiday looming, and all the craziness yet to do. Then I was a little under the weather, so the running - well, like I said, I only got two in, so that really bothered me. Haven't done strength training either and I literally feel like parts of me are turning to mush already...so THAT makes me mad.

So now I'm going to make myself a cup of tea and crawl into bed with my Oprah magazine. Most of you probably have heard of or seen the latest issue where Oprah is battling the scale again - very publicly (again). Something I read in her article last night really hit home for me...and it is just these words that have me pulling myself up and moving forward. Oprah says,

" I don't have a weight problem - I have a self-care problem that manifests through weight. My friend....shared with me, "your overweight self doesn't stand before you craving food. She's craving (self) love." Falling off the wagon isn't a weight issue; it's a love issue."

Ok, I may not be so 'overweight' anymore....but I could very easily be, the moment I let my guard down and succumb to life's stresses (again). Work demands, family demands....I found myself all last week scrambling to meet so many other's needs, and it was so EASY to put mine aside! As soon as I started putting myself aside, look what happened. I made poor food choices, I put off my exercise, then I felt guilty...and this is the very cycle that got me to that fateful day on my broken scale 5 months ago. I have to say that Oprah is on to something here....reading those words just really struck a chord with me. A few weeks in to this journey, I realized that putting this part of myself first was important, and everything else sort of fell into line nicely. This is NOT the week I just had, that is for SURE. But the important thing is that I recognize how and why things went a little haywire, and I am stopping it in it's tracks NOW.

Ok, NOW I am going to get that tea, and my cozy bed...

Because I've earned it!

Cheers!

I have a PLAN (of course)

Ok, after consulting various websites, message boards and magazines, I finally landed on a Half Marathon training plan through Runner's World SMART COACH. This was the plan that best matched my current level, and most closely mimics what I have been doing with the One Hour Running plan. I will finish the One Hour plan and start this training plan the week of December 29th. The first two weeks of this 16 week plan will be 'easy' weeks after coming off the One Hour Runs, which works out great because I've read that it's good to take a 'break' every 6-8 weeks or so.

This program will take me through 4/19th. That leaves me with 3 'cushion weeks' that I may need somewhere for illness, or 'life stuff' etc. If all goes well, I'll have the extra 3 - 4 weeks to maintain and taper. Based on this plan, I should be able to complete the Half Marathon in under 3 hours. I'm not all that concerned about the time really....this race is just about going the distance!

I finally got my replacement foot pod and took it for a test run this morning. Happy about that! I just had a simple 30 minute run early today - I have been a little viral this week (stomach, headache, 'blah' thing going around the house!), so it wasn't the most rockin run...but I got it done!

I'm a little behind on blog reading....but seems pretty 'quiet' out there since we're all a little busy these days I'm sure! I hope to catch up with everyone tomorrow or over the weekend!

Cheers ~

Cleveland Rocks in May 2009!

Well, apparently the secret is out so I guess I should officially announce that today I registered for the Cleveland Half Marathon in May 2009. The cool thing is, Shosh emailed me this morning and said 'do it now - go register'. So....I did! (If Shosh told me to go jump off a cliff I'd probably do that too, I trust her that much ha ha!) Well, across the miles we were apparently both registering at the same moment, because our bib numbers are consecutive!
(*gasp* cue the sci-fi music)

I am so happy Shosh was able to fit this in, and we are recruiting anyone and everyone who wants to join! (ie Nicole? are you in?)

This is the fun stuff that I look forward to, and why I love running - I love how it connects you with people from all over, and there is always something fun on the horizon, and a new goal to reach for.....running rocks!

Weigh In what-the???

The number on the scale this morning was so shocking it does not even deserve a moment of my attention or angst...my weight today is really irrelavant, BECAUSE....

The tape measure had a different story to tell today (thank goodness!)

Chest - 1/4"

Waist -1/2"

Hips no change

Thighs - 1/2"

It appears that I'm starting to lose in other areas now after much of the loss has been through the hip area thus far. It also seems that the number on the scale will be the last to go down for me, which I can handle - AS LONG AS I continue to shrink, ha ha.

I had a thought while watching Biggest Loser last night. Big guy ED, who started the show at something over 300 pounds, made a comment about his 'fatty liver' and other organs....I realized that people who are trying to lose weight typically think in terms of how they look on the outside, and the fat burning that goes on, the shrinking that happens etc. But, what about the fat that accumulates on the INSIDE? The fat that covers internal organs and poses the most dangerous health threat of all? I reminded myself that MY body probably needed to burn some of that internal scary stuff off too....that even though a number on the scale is not reflecting any obvious change, if I am continuing to exercise and burn calories and fat, reducing fat intake etc., my body is still working to eliminate the unhealthy fat - inside AND out.

A couple of people have told me that I didn't 'look' like I had 30 pounds to lose. But I know that the SCALE back in July indicated that, and I didn't have 'muscle' weight at the time to contradict that number...it makes me wonder how much 'internal' fat I started with...kind of a scary thought!

I had a 'hungry' day yesterday, and even broke down and ate some chocolate from one of those vendor baskets that arrived at work yesterday! Although I truly felt 'hungry', I also am mindful of the stress I'm under right now at work (my boss took an unexpected medical leave), and the stress of being ready for the holiday. Chris was sick this week - some sort of little flu bug, my husband is 'laid off' right now (nothing too concerning, just a slow time at work and very common in the trades...) All of these things add up to the sort of circumstances that, in the past, would lead me to make poor food choices. So yesterday, even though early in the day I truly felt hungry and needed fuel...by late afternoon I was busy and tired and stressed over work, and the quick grab of the chocolate was not a good choice made for the right reasons. In these moments, all we can do is dust ourselves off and today is another day!

However, the day ended great with Grace's very first violin concert last night. She looked so cute and 'professional' on stage....it was a fun night!

So....better eating today, a 30 minute run tonight (I was still a little sore yesterday from my 45 minute run Sunday so I rested one more day), some strength training tonight - and I am not going to dwell on the number on the scale today. After all, this weekend I am going shopping for some new dress pants for work! My size 10's are ridiculous...my wardrobe is in serious need of an overhaul. Who needs a scale when you can go buy a smaller size pant?

On Courage....

Courage /ˈkɜrɪdʒ, ˈkʌr-/ –noun
1. the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear; bravery.


You all know that I'm generally a positive, optimistic sort of person. I will soon be registering for the Cleveland Marathon in May. My first 'real' race. Real in terms of distance anyway....I keep going back and forth on whether or not I register for the 10K, or the Half. I am being wishy-washy! I hate wishy-washy, and yet here I am...becoming my own pet peeve!

I have 5 and 1/2 months to prepare for 13.1. By May, I will have been running for 10 months. AND, I will probably have SHOSH with me....However, I can just barely eek out 3 miles right now. I just.don't.know. 10K would be the 'easy' thing to do. And that's not the way I roll either.

I want to be courageous and rise to the challenge, but something inside me is hesitating. I need to sort this out and determine what exactly am I afraid of, and is it a valid fear? I've given myself until the 31st to decide, so I can be sure and get the $20 discount on registration, lol.

Wishy-washy or not, gotta get that $20 discount, THAT is for sure!

Another Milestone Reached...FINALLY

I FINALLY knocked out that 45 minute run!

Say it with me now....'WOOT!'

It was awesome...I feel good, the run felt good...it was indeed a very, very sweet run. I ran the whole time, with one 20 second stop to sip some water.

I am so proud I can hardly stand it!

Dear Santa.....

The very fact that Chris took the painstaking effort to write this all down puts him straight to the top of the 'Good List'. I was speechless when Chris proudly presented me with his Christmas Wish List last night...I can't even tell you how hard he must have worked on this, and the fact that I can pretty much decipher everything on it is even more astounding. I've said it before, and I'll say it again...Chris is my hero, my inspiration, my greatest teacher!

I give you, Chris' Christmas List:

(hints: look closely to see numerous Power Rangers, Pokemon, Yugi-Oh, High School Musical, Transformers....)

Let's Talk Running

I just love getting my Runner's World in the mail! It always seems to come at just the right time...when I'm feeling a little 'disconnected' from my new sport, or wondering how I can change things up to get a little faster, or how am I going to make it all winter on the treadmill, or, hmm....maybe I should be eating differently altogether to get off this plateau....then, it's like a big ray of sunshine glows on my mailbox, and voila! Runner's World to the rescue!

(Yes, I am a geek like this at times)

And then the dilemma....do I start with the articles that are most relevant to me at the moment? (ie 28 tips to Lose Weight, Get Inspired, Achieve Any Goal)...or, do I head straight for the 'Beginners: Feel Good On Every Run' (oh yeah....). Hmmm....what to do....just read from cover to cover? And then...do I blow through the magazine within a day or two? Or should I make it last throughout most of the month?

Well, my RW reading method varies month to month, but today during my bus ride, I skipped right to the 'New Year New You' section, to take the quiz to determine what distance I was born to run. I found this to be a great exercise for me, because it really confirmed what I think I already knew...I think I will (eventually) be a strong mid-distance (10K to 13.1) runner. My answers to the quiz actually fell in the 'Long Hauler' category. But since I'm still a 'newbie', I'm not even thinking of a marathon, but really look forward to doing a 10K or 1/2 marathon. To me, THAT is a Long enough Haul for now!

But, I agree with the quiz result...I say this for a couple of reasons. First, I have to admit I did not like my first 5K all that much. Yes, it was my first (and only) race ever, so there was nerves, and asthma and humidity and all that 'stuff', and of course the whole time thing ....and even though I was proud and happy after I finished, I wasn't all that 'high' about the race itself. I'm not saying I won't do 5K's, because I will do as many as I can next season...it's just not going to be my forte. I am not a fast runner, I may never be...so the pressure of running fast for 30 minutes or more, when most people finish a 5K in 30 mins or less...I almost feel like 'why bother'? Not that I want to BEAT anyone, because it's not about that for me...maybe the jury is still out and I'll change my thinking after the next 5K! We'll see...

I also think I will be a mid-long distance runner for the simple reason that it takes me about 15 - 20 minutes to really get settled and feeling comfortable on a run. Most workouts, I'm just starting to feel GREAT and it's time to stop! My mind is pleasantly occupied, daydreaming, thinking, planning, rockin' to music...my breathing is just getting comfortable and I'm relaxed...and then it's over, right when I feel like I could run all day. The first 15 minutes is sometimes downright 'painful'...I think to myself, I'm not going to get through this today. Then something clicks and it's all good.

So, the training strategies for me are to raise the lactate threshold (for middle distance running) and to improve running economy (for a Long Hauler). This is exactly what I am working on now~
My three runs each week go like this:

1 - (always 30 minutes) Hold a slightly faster pace than my long run
2nd run - Interval training: practice running faster, burns more calories
3rd run - Long run, slow and steady, working up to one hour.

Once I finish the One Hour Running program, I will switch to running for distance instead of time. However, I have decided to add a 4th day of easy running that will be a 3 mile run. Time doesn't matter, pace doesn't matter, I will just say, "today I run 3 miles"., and see how long it takes. Hopefully each week it will get a little faster!

I really think I need to add this 4th day to get me off the plateau I am currently experiencing - with both weight and running. Also, I'm doing it for Dave, who is streakin' right now and since I can't run every day yet, I will at least add a day. Anything for SuperDave! :-)

Anyway, I love RW and am about 1/2 hour from crawling into bed and reading more!

And so, Bloggie Peeps, How do YOU read your RW? And second question, what type of running 'specialist' are you? Speed Racer? Middle Distance, or Long Hauler? Inquiring minds want to know! Do share...

The Last Ten (well 12, as of today)

My weigh-in posts are getting bor.ing.... :-) No change on the scale this week. Today I weighed 147. I'm still bouncing between 146 - 148 these days. So, since July 26th, when I started this journey, I've lost 15 pounds, and 9.5 inches. The biggest loss is 3" from my hips.

My original goal weight was 130 pounds. The smallest I have ever been is 125. I had NO muscle back then and ate like a bird. Skinny, but not fit. However, I'm starting to think that 135 may be a more reasonable goal weight for me. I say this for a couple of reasons.

Anyone who has gotten to that 'last 10 pound' mark knows how DIFFICULT it is to lose that! It's like our body says no way dude, I'm not given THESE up....you're gonna have to fight me for these 10! I'm feeling like that is where I am now. If I say to someone, I still have about 15 pounds to lose, they freak out - especially my mother, who of course says ' I think you are at a perfect place and don't need to lose any more weight'. Or I get the, 'if you lose 15 more pounds, you will disappear!' speech from friends. Some people say I am 'tiny'...which is funny to me because my brain is still in 'over 40 and frumpy' on most days!

All of this to say, I am going to re-direct my goal weight to 135 for now. I am 5' 4.5" tall, and 144 pounds is the 'max' recommended weight for my height/age accoring to WW. But, because I have muscle now, and of course given my 'over 40' status, I think that 135 is more reasonable. It still doesn't change the fact that I am stuck in The Last Ten pounds, but it makes me mentally relax a little - 10 pounds doesn't seem as 'hard' to lose as 15. It took me 4 months to lose 15 pounds, and at the rate I'm going now, it will take much, much longer than that to lose another 17 pounds! I think I'm at the point that I realize I don't have 17 more pounds to lose.

More muscle and 10 less pounds of me will help me be a better runner. That's what I really want! I want to get the weight down so I can focus soley on fitness. So, here's to The Last Ten (12 as of today), time to 'git'er done'!

Defining Success

How do we define success? (In case you didn't know), the official dictionary definition is this:

suc⋅cess   [suhk-ses]
–noun
1.the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors.
2.the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like.
3.a successful performance or achievement.
4.a person or thing that is successful...
5.Obsolete.

Because it is the beginning of yet another new month, I felt the need to recap my somewhat lofty November goals and look forward to this month. Here were my November goals, and the pretty 'unimpressive' results that, on paper, don't seem to be a very 'favorable or prosperous termination of attempts':

1) Be more consistent with cross training on non-run days. Not consistent!

2) Strength train 3 days a week, and that will ALWAYS include the ABS. Um...2 days a week and Abs were built in to the total body workout.

3) Include more vegetables in my diet. Sort of successful here, but not as diligent as I had planned to be...improved, but not perfect!

4) By meeting the first three goals, I hope this translates to a goal weight of 140 by the end of the month. Uh...I lost one pound last month, or is it two? I forget....

5) Since this is the month of giving thanks, I promise to end each blog entry with a thankful thought. Started out great, but then forgot to do this...must've been all the other significant topics I had to write about....this is not to say I don't have an abundance of gratitude, because I do...I just can't prove it out every day! ;-)

So, to read all of this, I might think I really wasted an entire month, but surprisingly - I feel great about where I am right now! (even though I STILL have not done that 45 minute run). Oh well! Last week I ran Tuesday (30 min), did the hour & 1/2 hike on Thursday, about 8-10 miles walking on Friday, about 3 miles of walking on Saturday....so I did ok getting exercise...it just was not a RUNNING week. THIS week is a running week, and I'm good with that.

My weight loss? Or lack of I should say....I feel pretty good about so many other things at the moment and the scale really is losing it's importance for me. How ironic! I started this blog BECAUSE of the scale, now I am suceeding in SPITE of the scale. These days I seem to be shrinking in places I don't typically measure, my pants are ridiculously loose. There's a whole lot of losin' going on...there's no doubt about that! So I weigh myself every morning, with a smile, and move on. (well the smile part is a half truth....ha)

My relationship with food is healthy. No more emotional eating...when the going gets tough, I get moving! The first thing I think of when I start feeling stressed is, when can I hit the road and run, or the treadmill....THAT is a sweet feeling I must say.

But November is not a total wash....no, no, no! There were lots of surprise successes along the way...and I'm beginning to think surprise success is even better than 'planned' success. Let's see....I climbed a mountain, I met a special blog friend in person, I put on my fav size 6 skinny jeans - yep, all the way on, zipped, buttoned....I'm only a couple, three weeks away from wearing them comfortably. I've added 12 minutes to my longest run, I lost another inch off my waist.

This is all good, and I have decided NOT to outline a list of lofty December goals. I choose to be 'surprised' at the end of the month - I don't need a scale, I don't need a list to follow. All I need is to keep doing what I am doing ~ the success is sure to follow!

The View From The Top

Back to 'the grind' today! I am suffering from Blog Withdrawal, lol...at a quick glance I see I have lots of lunchtime reading material today! I'm looking forward to catching up on everyone's holiday weekend!

We returned from our Virginia excursion late Saturday night. In a nutshell, we had an active, fun, family filled adventure! The highlight for me was on Thanksgiving morning, when, instead of running the originally planned Turkey Trot, the 'big kids' of the family decided to go climb a mountain trail at a nearby national park. (the name escapes me for the moment, too early!) This was a big thrill for me, because one year ago - I never would have been able to do this, or, at the very least - I would have struggled greatly, or would have chosen a different activity altogether. For THIS hike, I was strong, confident, and thrilled to participate, and even be up to the front of the 'pack' instead of lagging behind.

The trail was a total of 2.5 miles, up and down. It took 17 minutes to get to the top. I wore my heart rate monitor because I was curious to see what kind of 'workout' this would truly be. HA! What was I thinkin? I was well aware of my heart rate, no monitor needed! It was truly awesome. And with great company on the way to the top, it was such a great way to spend Thanksgiving morning. Here we are heading out, see the incline? It was like that all the way up!

Here is a shot from half way up - note my sister in law down there giving my hubby a little 'nudge' up the hill (wink wink):

And finally, the view from the top. It was stunningly beautiful. Metaphorically speaking, I have to say, the view from this vantage point, high on a mountain, is truly the best.

The rest of the weekend was filled with family love, laughs, kid-fun, good food, a day in DC sightseeing (walked about 10 miles!), and a day in Gettysburg on the way home. The kids had a blast, and we arrived home pleasantly exhausted. Here is the hubby and I after sharing a dance in the kitchen while helping with the turkey dinner:

Yesterday was spent decorating the house for Christmas, and the whirlwind begins!

Off to get ready for work now. I am happy to say that it appears I have suffered no 'damage' on the scale thus far this week...keeping fingers crossed! :-)

I'll be bombarding everyone with multiple comments later today I'm sure! I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday weekend!